Plan was to meet friends at Elsie's at 9pm. I arrived on time and as I guessed, they were late. I wondered into their bowling alley and they had cosmic bowling in full swing, with black lights and disco. I noticed right away that for some reason, there was a bright splotch of something near my crotch that showed up brightly in the black lights. I had no idea WTF it was, but I knew I would have a difficult time explaining it if my party decided to do some bowling while we were at Elsie's. So I went home to change pants. I am pretty sure it's not one thing and I am pretty sure it's not the other thing either. I was really curious as to how the hell my jeans got miscolored under those lamps.

Thankfully, roommate Matt had a black light hanging around and I took a look with it. Partially to my relief but to add to my confusion, I realized these "splotches" were not just on my crotch but all over my jeans. I then checked a number of other pairs of jeans and noticed there were splotches all over them as well - and even a pair of khakis I have.

I wonder if it's the laundry detergent I switched to -- or maybe I suck at laundry. Probably one or the other or both.

Either way, for the next couple months, please, nobody invite me out for cosmic bowling.